Devotional: Expressing Feelings through Words

Job 35:16, “So Job opens his mouth with empty talk; without knowledge, he multiplies words.”

We are prone to it! Without exception, we open our mouths with “empty talk.” There is a certain amount of normalcy in grief that leads us to vain babbling. There is also a therapeutic effect to talking. One of the greatest things a companion/friend can do is to be a non-judgmental listener, which allows the grief sufferer to fully express his/her feelings.

As Job talks, he is expressing his feelings through words. He reveals his thoughts and sufferings through “empty talk.” One of the worst things a friend or companion can do is judge the grief sufferer and try to correct them during this time period. This type of correction serves to bolster the pride of the caregiver as if he/she has more perfect knowledge. On the other hand, it often leads the grief sufferer to “clam up” and further suppress their true feelings, which is not healthy.

The most important thing that a caregiver/companion can do is to listen! Job’s friends were judgmental toward Job and accused him of bringing everything on himself. They accused him of a hidden sin worthy of accusation. What they did not know at the time, was that the Lord had declared Job righteous. Job was not blaspheming God by sharing his deepest thoughts and feelings, but he did give God all his emotions. When we are around a grieving family member or friend, let’s be careful what we may say, so that we don’t hinder the healing process as a grief sufferer expresses his/her feelings through words. They may seem like “empty talk” at the time, but may have a healing effect on the grief sufferer.

As one scholar suggested for grief companions, “Show up, shut up, and stay a while!”