Job 2: 11, “When Job’s three friends…., heard about all the troubles that had come upon him, they set out from their homes and met together by agreement to go and sympathize with him and comfort him.”
The story of Job’s friends comforting him in the loss of his adult children is a great example of grief care in Scripture. Job’s friends surrounded him in his time of loss and tried to comfort him. In this brief passage (Job 2:11-13) we see at least five grief skills: compassion, empathy, presence, silence, and sympathy.
Job’s three friends were most likely his peers, tribal leaders with equal social status in their communities. Upon hearing of Job’s loss, they met together and planned a trip to see Job. Their trip was planned with the intention of expressing their sympathy in hopes of providing a measure of comfort to Job and his wife.
In our times of loss, the attentiveness of friends is an important part of coping with loss. The presence of friends reminds us that we are loved and cared for in our time of need. Not only did Job’s friends bless him with their presence, but they also empathized with Job’s suffering as they wept aloud, tore their clothes, and sprinkled dust on their heads. They came sympathetically but felt Job’s pain and their sympathy turned to empathy as they took on the pain that Job felt. (I’ll explain the difference between sympathy and empathy in a later post.)
One of the most important parts of their grief care was that they sat in silence, as “no one said a word to him.” We often hear that “Silence is golden,” but in grief care it is invaluable. In fact, it is not until Job’s friends start talking that they botch things up.
The silent presence of friends or loved ones is comforting and conveys an abiding love for the grief sufferer.
GEC (Grief Education Center) 