What You Need to Know about Grief!

From Norman H. Wright’s book, Reflections of a Grieving Spouse

1. Your grief will take longer than most people think. (To recover from the loss of a spouse, whether through death or divorce, will likely take three to five years.) 
2. Your grief will take more energy than you ever imagined. 
3. Your grief will involve many changes and will continue to develop. 
4. Your grief will show in all spheres of your life. 
5. Your grief will depend on how you perceive the loss. 
6. You will grieve for many things symbolic and tangible, not just for the death alone. 
7. You will grieve for what you have lost already, and for what you have lost for the future. 
8. Your grief will entail mourning, not only for the person you lost, but also for hopes, dreams, and unfulfilled expectations you held for and with that person and for the unmet needs because of death. 
9. Your grief will involve a wide variety of feelings and reactions more than just the general ones often depicted, such as depression and sadness. 
10. Your loss will resurrect old issues, feelings, and unresolved conflicts from the past. 
11. You may have a combination of anger and depression, exhibited as irritability, frustration, annoyance, and intolerance. 
12. You will feel some anger and guilt – or at least some manifestation of these emotions. 
13. You may experience grief spasms – acute upsurges of grief that occur without warning. 
14. You will have trouble thinking about memories, handling organizational tasks, intellectually processing information, and making decisions. 
15. You may feel like you are going insane.
16. You may be obsessed with the death and preoccupied with the deceased. 
17. Others will have unrealistic expectations about your mourning and may respond inappropriately to you.