Wrong Things to Say to a Bereaved Person

Harold Ivan Smith identifies 22 things not to say to a grieving person. See if you’ve said a few of these….

1. “I know how you feel.”
2. “You shouldn’t feel that way.”
3. “It was God’s will.”
4. “You’ve got to get on with your life.”
5. “You’ve got to be strong.”
6. “God took him/her.”
7. “God needed him/her.”
8. “You should be over that by now.”
9. “You can have other children.” (loss of a child- yes, people say stupid stuff)
10. “God is testing you.”
11. “Good will come out of it.”
12. “It’s best for you.”
13. “Just turn it over to God.” (implies if you have faith, you should not grieve.)
14. “You’re so lucky your loved one is in heaven.”
15. “God never gives you more than you can handle.”
16. “You are not handling it right.”
17. “Time heals all wounds.”
18. “You’ll get over it.”
19. “You shouldn’t talk about it.”
20. “I could never handle it like you are. I’d go crazy.”
21. Please, don’t say anything that implies guilt.
22. Don’t even ask “How are you doing?”, unless you really want to know and are willing to take the time to listen.