What is Grief Ambush?

Grief Ambush

What is grief ambush? Theresa Rando says it is “an acute upsurge in grief that occurs suddenly and often when least expected, interrupting ongoing activities and temporarily leaving a person out of control.”

You may not have known what it is called, but you know what it feels like to be ambushed by grief. It comes on you suddenly, unexpectedly, as if you are under attack. I experienced it Sunday when I got into my dad’s old gray truck. I had been in the truck the day before, but it had been cold and nothing caught my attention. But, as I got in the truck Sunday afternoon, with the warmer temperature, I could smell my dad. Yes, that’s right! And that’s when grief ambushed me, and I started crying. It has been six months since his passing, and it still doesn’t seem real sometimes.

I wasn’t alone in the truck. My son, Jonah, was with me. He knew something was wrong. I couldn’t hide the tears, so I told him. He knew it, He could smell Pawpaw too. But Jonah didn’t cry. Instead, he tried to lighten the mood and asked me, “Have you touched the radio since you’ve driven the truck?” I said, “No.” He said, “I bet you that it’s set to southern gospel music…” So, I turned on the radio and of course, it was playing southern gospel music, and we had a good laugh.

Grief ambush attacks you often when you least expect it, even after you have grieved for a while. Sometimes you may anticipate it, and maybe even prepare yourself a little. Other times it will catch you by surprise, and you wilt. But that’s okay. I say it like this, “The tears you cry are a reflection of the love you shared. Just remember, that’s love running down your cheeks.”